David Meyer is the mayor of the City of Fairfax. Before that, he served on the city council. He’ll never forget the aphorism the since-retired city manager shared with him: “There are two things an elected official needs — gray hair and hemorrhoids. The gray hair makes you look distinguished, and the hemorrhoids give you a look of concern.”
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I didn’t ask David whether he’s, um, grown into his role.
That’s just one of the memorable bits of advice readers have sent my way this week.
In 1990, Jay Silberman was running for the District school board. On his way to a community event, he found himself stopped at a red light next to Thomas P. “Tip” O’Neill Jr.
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“I rolled down my window and handed him my campaign flyer,” Jay wrote. “He glanced at it for a few seconds, and then called over: ‘Just remember this: People like to be asked and people like to be thanked.’？”
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The light turned green and the former speaker of the House sped off. Jay knew that he’d just received some of the best political advice ever given — and he won his election.
When the District’s Nick Allard served as dean of Brooklyn Law School, he got to know one of the school’s most famous graduates: David Dinkins, former mayor of New York City.
Nick once visited Dinkins to ask his advice about a particularly sticky administrative situation. The savvy pol leaned back in his chair, smiled and said, “Take two and hit to right.”
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At first, Nick wasn’t sure what Dinkins meant. “But eventually I got what he was saying: Size up what you are dealing with,” Nick wrote. “And you don’t have to swing for the fences, just try the practical, doable things best for your team.”
Here’s the best advice Carmen Martinez of Falls Church, a former U.S. ambassador, ever got: “Don’t believe your own press releases.”
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Wrote Carmen: “This served me in good stead in a 33-year diplomatic career.”
The advice Laura Provan of Ellicott City received nearly 50 years ago was a little less diplomatic. It came from the hippie mechanic working on her 1972 Volkswagen van: “Don’t take no [excrement] from no bureaucrats.”
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Virginia Beach attorney Steve Emmert said he’s occasionally called upon to give advice to young lawyers.
“I have plenty of highbrow ideas, but candidly, the most valuable tidbit is decidedly lowbrow: ‘Never enter a courtroom on a full bladder or an empty stomach,’？” he wrote. “No one has ever asked me to explain it in more detail.”
When Steven Schattman was looking for his first real job, he sought advice from his favorite uncle, a fashion-conscious Yale graduate.
“The pearls of wisdom he bestowed on me were, ‘Think Yiddish, dress British,’？” wrote Steven, of Chevy Chase, Md. “Actually after thinking about it, they made a lot of sense.”
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Alicia Wray of Santa Rosa, Calif., has never forgotten some financial advice she received. It was the 1990s and the high-tech company she worked at gave employees stock options. Everyone was expecting the stock to break $60 a share, more than enough to help Alicia put a down payment on a house.
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But the stock stayed stubbornly below $60.
“I asked my boss if he thought I should wait a while before selling,” she wrote. “He said: ‘Alicia, when the time is right and the price is good enough, that’s the time to sell. Anything else is gambling.’？”
Alicia sold at $58 and put the proceeds on a starter home.
“The company’s stock price went to about $59 and started tumbling — and it never did reach $60 a share,” she wrote.
Speaking of finance, Bj？rn Bieneck of Fredericksburg, Va., once attended a conference where casino magnate and serial entrepreneur Sheldon Adelson shared some advice: “If somebody throws money at you, don’t duck.”
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When Ted Mastroianni of Washington was about to enter the U.S. Navy, he asked his older brothers — who both had served — if they had any tips. They did: “Make sure you always get top bunk, especially for storms.”
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Wrote Ted: “It paid off many, many times.”
Roger Hartman of Annandale said some of the best advice comes from the world of aviation. His favorite tip is one for pilots: “Never run out of altitude, airspeed and ideas all at the same time.”
Jay Shaffer of Fairfax said that after a day of practicing bayonet kill moves, an Army drill instructor shared the No. 1 rule of bayonet combat: “Don’t run out of bullets.”
When Millie Hurlbut of Lanham gave birth to her daughter, the doctor told her, “You will receive loads of advice about raising your child. Don’t take any. Do your own research and follow your instincts.”
Finally, the District’s David Stonner noted that a wise man once said, “Beware of taking advice from anonymous wise men.”
Wrote David: “I’ve always tried to follow this bit of wisdom.”
Thanks to all the readers — wise and otherwise — who shared their advice.
Twitter: @johnkelly
For previous columns, visit washingtonpost.com/john-kelly